My father and I had an interesting conversation the other day about the voices in our heads and how our minds work. He explained to me how he thinks in shapes and images, with the occasional monologue or two. His description took me by surprise.
Shapes and images with an occasional monologue?
It seems unimaginable to me.
My mind is loud. It is a mess.
A jumble of words, like a never-ending script that no one will ever read but me. There is always a conversation going on between the frightfully negative me and the hopelessly positive me. Sure there are images there and some music, too. But it’s never quiet. It truly is, as Virginia Woolf put it, “…a hive of words that won’t settle.” I’m always either discussing something in my mind or writing something like a journal entry that just drags on and on and on. (Sort of like how I write in this blog…)
When someone tells me to make my mind blank, I’m thinking, “Blank, blank, blank… Urgh! I can’t stop thinking of the word ‘blank!'”
Am I starting to sound like a crazy person? Or am I a crazy person who has an inner monologue going at all hours (like JD in Scrubs)?
I wonder how it would feel if I could mute the narrating in my head. Would it be liberating? Refreshing? …Lonely? I guess I’ll never really know.
What’s it like in your head?
I’m very curious. I’d truly like to know.